Kuba uri umugabo ugakubitwa n’umugore ni ihohoterwa ritera ipfunwe abagabo benshi. Usanga akenshi bikunze kugirwa ubwiru hakavugwa gusa iby’abagabo bahohotera abagore. Hari impamvu nyinshi zishobora gutuma umugabo ukubitwa n’umugore we yicira urubanza cyangwa yumva asigaye wenyine.
Imana ntiyishimira ihohoterwa — yaba irikorerwa umugore cyangwa umugabo. Iyo umugabo ahura n’ihohoterwa, harimo gukubitwa n’umugore, aba akwiriye kwitabwaho no gusigasirwa nk’undi wese.
Dore icyo umugabo yakora kugira ngo atiteranya n’Imana, ahubwo arusheho kuyiyegereza nubwo akubitwa n’umugore we:
1. Irinde gusubiza urugomo ku rundi
“Ntukishyure ikibi ku kindi... ahubwo mushake icyiza imbere y’abantu bose.” (Abaroma 12:17)
Nubwo waba ubabaye cyangwa utotezwa, kureka ko uburakari bugucaho ni intambwe ya mbere yo kutiteranya n’Imana. Irinde kumukubita ngo "umusubize", cyangwa kumuhindura umwanzi. Kora ibishoboka byose ngo wigenzure — kandi Imana izaguha imbaraga.
2. Shaka ubufasha — si icyaha gushaka kurengerwa
Niba ukubitwa, ntibivuze ko ukwiriye gutuza ukicecekera igihe cyose. Gushaka ubufasha si uguca inyuma Imana, ahubwo ni ukugira ubwenge n’ubugingo.
Waganira n’abakozi b’Imana bizewe, abajyanama b’ubuzima bwo mu mutwe (psychologists), cyangwa se inzego z’ubutabera iyo bikabije. N’ubwo bitoroshye mu mico ya benshi, umugabo ukubitwa akwiye kurengerwa kimwe n’umugore.
3. Senga usabe Imana umutima wo gutuza no kuyoborwa
Senga usaba ko Imana iguha kumenya igihe cyo kuvuga n’igihe cyo gutuza. Hari igihe kwihangana bifite agaciro, ariko hari n’igihe gusohoka mu bubabare bifite icyo bivuze. “Imana ntiyishimira amakimbirane, ahubwo ishaka amahoro” (Zaburi 34:14).
4. Iga gutandukanya imbabazi n’iyicarubozo
Kwihanganira umugore wawe ntibisobanuye kwemera gukubitwa iteka. Hari ubwo ushobora kumubabarira, ariko ugahitamo kumuhunga kugira ngo ubungabunge ubuzima bwawe n’umutima wawe. Imbabazi si ugupfukirana amakosa, ahubwo ni ukwanga inzika ariko ukemera gufata ingamba.
5. Fata icyemezo kitari icy’amarangamutima
Iyo ubabaye, ushobora gushaka guhita umuca, kumuhunga, cyangwa kwigira kure. Ariko fata umwanya usenge, ugishe inama, usuzume impamvu byageze aho bigeze.
Ese ni umubabaro umwe wageze aho utavugwa? Ese ni ibintu bimaze igihe?
Ntugafate icyemezo udatuje. Imana ikunda imitima yicisha bugufi kandi ishaka ko ukomeza gukizwa.
